Saturday, 27 June 2009

Alfred Hitchcock ain't got nuthin' on this.....

Yesterday morning I was riding my bicycle up on the north side of the island. I've got the Ipod on super loud, listening to some Linkin Park,rocking out, in the zone, doing the exercise thing.

As I'm riding, a garbage truck pulls out, and as they swung to turn, something icky fell out of the back of the truck and lands on the street.

This giant vulture swoops down and starts ripping into it,as I'm approaching. I see the icky giant bird and hook left. The bird, who is facing me, takes off inflight and dodges right.

We collide mid chest. I've got a wing in my face and I'm batting wildly at the damn thing while attempting to remain upright on the bike, all the whiie shreaking like a little girl. We're talking screams here, where it's just sounds, ACK, ACK, ACK, since I'm not even capable of forming a sentence.

I managed to remain upright while beating off the messenger of death, although I did susain a minor injury to my private parts as I jammed the handbars into my pubic bone.

It was one of the most repugnant things that has ever occured to me. Have you ever smelled those things! Aside frrom being literally butt ugly, they stink. Really badly.

You know as soon as I got the bicycle under contol I started looking around to see who actually saw that. The You Tube video is probably worth some serious cash.

I showered with bleach, and did some serious exfoliation.

I think this is a sign from God that exercise is bad for you.


Ms. Moon said...

Ooh. I have seen those vultures up north. They are nasty. This was an unfortunate event. I doubt even bleach will wash away the memory.

Anonymous said...

Only YOU could have a close encounter with a buzzard on a bicycle.


Gladys said...

All I can picture is that Buzzard from the Warner Bros cartoons of my youth.

"I'm bringing home a baby bumble bee...won't my mommy be so proud of me.."

Lisa..... said...

Ack! That's crazy!!!

cozzie laura said...

So far, I think I'm in the clear. It's such a small place that someone would have told me or the fab man about it. I've already had 2 phone calls about the dead car that I left in the giant rain puddle yesterday..

Hockey Girl said...

I cannot believe you actually stayed on the bike..I would have taken a dive.
Ohh and I love Linkin Park.

Anonymous said...


You may have no idea how lucky you are.

I know of someone who died from an collision with a vulture. He was his motorcycle down a FL back road. I can't say who was to blame, but they collided. The vulture hit him in the chest, the motorcyclist died from the impact. I have no knowledge of the condition of the vulture.

Anonymous said...

[url=]AifByqCPopoAIRt[/url] - QtiXn ,